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Title Page/Table of Contents -- Economics 101, a Novel

Economics 101, A Novel (A College and Desert Island Love Story) by Joel Matthew Rees (Copyright 2016-2021, Joel Matthew Rees.) A...

Monday, September 20, 2021

Economics 101, a Novel, ch 4, The Second Semester: pt 2 -- Dating Others

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It's hard to name drop when you won't recognize most of the names. For instance, I'm sure you've never heard of Aqixi Tzuxasa. 

But you may have heard of Lee Krasner, an artist in your world, of similar talent and modes of expression. 

 


 

"What do you think of this abstract painting by Aqixi Tzuxasa?"

The painting she indicated was a study in parallel lines and rectangles of various colors, with rhomboid connecting lines giving it the illusion of three dimensions.

"Aqixi Tzuxasa? Who is he?"

Trisha looked at Karel in mock disgust. "She. You don't know Aqixi Tzuxasa?"

"Sorry."

"It can be forgiven." She turned back to the painting with a sly grin, framing it with both hands. "So what do you think of it?"

"I'm standing here wondering if maybe she'd been seeing semiconductor layouts in her nightmares."

"You have no artistic soul!"

"Just kidding. But doesn't it remind you, just a little, of a bunch of transistors on a silicon wafer?"

Trisha cocked her head and thought for a bunmu before nodding with a chuckle. "Okay, I'll give you that." 

They moved to the next exhibit. 

Karel stopped at one painting. "This painting seems to have a lot of religious symbolism."

"Mm hmm?" 

"The snake is being crushed by a large construction block that could be a cornerstone."

"Yeah."

"And the woman has her foot on a globe of the world. She glows from within, maybe she symbolizes faith?"

"You wouldn't be alone in thinking so."

"What do you think?"

"I tend to think of her as representing all the virtues."

"This one of a painter painting a picture of a woman in an indigo dress seems to be by the same painter. Rather attractive young woman. Ah, Wanjoqo, it says. It is the same."

"Mm hmm."

"And this one." Karel indicated a painting of a young woman in an indigo turban. "Could be the same young woman. Maybe the painter's daughter?"

"Maybe. What do you know about Wanjoqo?"

"Uh, just that he's one of the painters from the Xeliqutzu period."

Trisha looked turned to look at Karel expectantly.

"What?"

"And what do you know about Xeliqutzu art?"

"Very intricately worked, very ornate, very complex. Some critics say overly so."

"No pun?"

"Mmmm, not particularly, why?"

"Never mind." She turned back to look at another painting.

"If it ain't Xeliqutzu, don't fix it," Karel muttered.

Trisha rolled her eyes.

"One of my bosses used to say it."

She shook her head and smirked.

"You know, you look more than a little like her. The young woman in the third painting, I mean."

"Ri-ight."

They moved on, stopping occasionally to comment.

 


 

The women in my family seem to tend toward the graphic arts.

The men in my family lean more towards the mechanical and dynamic arts -- engineering, physics, electronics, computer programming, working on the car, martial arts, dance.

So I'm not going to waste a lot of time trying to make you think I know anything about the art that Trisha and Karel looked at.

How it was that OHU was able to bring in three well-known paintings by Wanjoqo, I'm not sure. The paintings were protected by a glass display, but that was all. I guess, at the time, Wanjoqo didn't quite yet have the reputation as a leading artist of Xhilr's Xeliqutzu period that Vermeer, whose style and subject matter are very similar, has now as a leading artist of the Baroque period in our world.

Oh, and, yes, the art museum at Orson Hyde University is often open fairly late on Saturday nights, specifically to give the students constructive things to do on dates.

 


 

As they left the museum, Trisha caught Karel's hand. 

He resisted for a moment, then relaxed.

"You're a complex person. I take back what I said about you not having an artistic soul."

"Thanks, I guess."

"I mean, your joke about the silicon wafers. There is something artistic about wafer layouts."

Karel grinned. "Actually, I can't take all the credit for that. When I showed my mom a scrapped wafer from work under a microscope, she said it looked like modern art."

They walked in silence for another bun before he continued. "But I think there is a lot of art in wafer design, too. Designs that don't work often seem to be missing something aesthetically. And after I got used to inspecting them, I found I could usually tell the wafers that didn't make it through manufacturing by patterns in the reflected light that were missing or changed, and just looked wrong. I always tested, of course, but looking at the patterns often told me what to test first."

"How did you get into semiconductor engineering?"

"I'd done some solid-state work in my physics and chem classes, and I just thought it was fun. Someday, you know, we're going to be putting whole computers on a wafer."

(Forgive the prescience?)

"Do you think I'd like it? Semiconductor engineering, I mean."

"I'd have to get to know you better to be able to say one way or another. Lots of boring stuff to it -- you have to use calculus to prove that certain arrangements are worth experimenting with, and use more to design the tests and analyze the results. And the tests can be really boring to watch, but you have to watch them. And the fabrication equipment is expensive, so management wants to keep it running as much as possible, and they want to hire semiskilled technicians to run the lines, to cut costs. Hard to get time to get your hands into things, to complete the tests and to try new ideas."

"Sounds exciting."

They walked together in silence for a few bunmu

Trisha looking off into the sky, at the stars in the gap between the larger orb of the hinter moon and the smaller orb of the nether. 

"I imagine a fabrication line, and I think it might look like a kind of dance,"she said, absently.

"Heh. Where did that come from?"

"Are you interested in dance?"

Karel thought for a moment. "Some friends and I are taking a folk dance class."

"How about modern dance?"

Karel had to let go of Trisha's hand. "Yeah. Sure."

Trisha seemed not to notice the sudden distance. "I'm working on the lights for a student modern dance concert next month. I could get you backstage, if you're interested."

Karel was quiet as Trisha began to talk excitedly about the lights and the control panel. But he got caught up in her enthusiasm, and soon they were not just holding hands, but his arm was around her waste as she talked about the wiring, the math for setting things up, the timing, and so forth. He seemed  as much surprised at his own actions as by hers when she suddenly turned and tilted her head just enough to steal a kiss.

He smiled sheepishly and returned the kiss, and they continued walking and talking. An observer might have noticed a certain distance returned to his expression, posture, to tone of voice. Trisha seemed not to, or maybe she chose to ignore it, continuing to chat with him about dance and art and technology.

*****

"So, who do you think is more important, Tama Kulosa or Riqae Huqumas?"  

(These were two dancers whose influence and fame were similar to Isadora Duncan's and Loie Fuller's in our world.)

"I have to make a choice?" Bobbie closed her eyes and chuckled.

"Just trying to make conversation, I guess. They're both important?"

"I think so. All the early dancers contributed a lot to what we have now." Bobbie looked at her program. "Do you know many of the dancers here tonight?"

"Sure. I know them all. We're all friends. In fact, I was kind of drafted to bring you here."

"What?"

"You're famous. The poster from when you came for your master's project hung on the wall in the office up until recently. Half of the teachers say your workshop several years back is what inspired them to continue."

Bobbie hung her head. "No way! That poster. They took it down, of course?"

"Sister Cherry, the department head, was so upset that you were taking ballroom dance instead of something of substance that she tore it down. But I rescued it.

"What have I wrought?" Bobbie said under her breath.

"What? I didn't catch that."

"Nothing."

"I've watched the film they took of one of your lessons. Your technique is so free! You wouldn't be willing to do something impromptu tonight, would you?"

"Charles. Mmm, You said you prefer to be called Charles."

"I wouldn't really mind if you wanted to call me Chuck."

"No. Charles is probably what I should call you." Bobbie glanced sideways. Charles was beaming, seeming not to be in the real world. He seemed to be wanting, but not daring, to say something, and his expression began to take on hints of frustration or sadness.

"Charles, were you among the students who joined my workshop?"

"Yes, I was!" he said eagerly.

Now she felt a little embarrassed. "I'm sorry I don't remember you. But you should understand that the woman who gave that workshop no longer exists."

"What?"

"She never did, really. She was a slave to a lot of things. Dance was almost idolatry for her." She paused. "More than almost, maybe."

Charles's face clouded in confusion, but he did not say anything.

"She was not free at all. If she looked free, I would have to assume it was because she was trying so hard to be, and dance was her only outlet. But she was not free. And she is not the same person with you tonight." Bobbie paused again and looked down. "Oh, I shouldn't be telling you all this."

Charles's face cleared a little.

"Okay, so you've given up dance, ..." He said, a little sadly.

"Not completely. I still dance for exercise pretty much every day. But other things are more important now. I definitely don't keep much dance vernacular in my head any more."

At that, he brightened considerably. "Well, even so, you have to come backstage afterwards. Everyone will be so disappointed if you don't."

"Okay, I'll join the party after. So you're performing after intermission, right?"

"Yes. The second number. I hope you'll tell me where I can improve."

"We'll see if I have anything useful to contribute." She smiled at him, and he became positively radiant.

After the last number and a curtain call, the audience left, except for a few who were friends and relatives of the students who had performed. 

Bobbie followed Charles through the curtain to the stage area.

Several students gathered around immediately, asking her opinion, and Bobbie recalled their performances and offered her impressions. As she did, more students gathered, and she gave them her impressions of each number performed that night, congratulating the students on their work. 

Teachers also gathered around, and soon there was clamor for an extemporaneous performance. At first, she demurred, pointing out that it had been several years since she had performed or produced any choreography.

But Sister Cherry, who preferred "Sister" to "Professor" or "Dean", said, "Once a dancer, always a dancer! And dancers are always choreographing in their heads. Life is a dance and choreography is breathing. You, yourself said so."

So Bobbie was prevailed upon, and she improvised a series of dance impressions from the performances, which was well received.

Sister Cherry seemed to have wanted more, but she refrained from pushing Bobbie. As Bobbie and Charles left, she caught up with them. "Thank you, Bobbie."

"Thank you for letting me come. It's been a while."

"Glad to have you. And I want to say, thanks especially for keeping the critique light."

Bobbie smiled. "You know I prefer to focus on the good unless there is real reason to do otherwise. Definitely noticed no reason tonight."

On their way back, Charles chatted happily. An observer might have noticed something of her work as a professional nurse, staying with him, letting him lead the conversation, refraining from talking about the internal conflicts she might -- no, must have been feeling. 

He seemed satisfied to exchanged a clasped hand and a hug at her door, for which she was grateful. 

*****

"So how was your date with Trisha?" Dan asked.

Karel was a little evasive. "Nice girl, but it seems like we don't really connect. Guess I learned a bit about modern art."

"So you're don't need to go on any more dates with her, right?"

"Actually, she wants me to take her to the modern dance concert next month. She seems to think she can instill a love of art in me. I always thought I liked art just fine."

"Are you going to take her?"

"Unless she changes her mind, I guess. I wonder if Bobbie will be there."

"Don't do this to yourself. Or to her. Let her find someone else to take her."

"I tried suggesting that she would be fighting an uphill battle with me, but that didn't discourage her."

"You're doing it again."

"Huh? Strange behavior on the playing field?"

"Exactly. You might as well have waved the red cape at her."

"Bulls are male."

(Yes, Xhilr has its versions of both corrida de toros and course libre.)

"Doesn't make a bit of difference. Some women go crazy when offered a challenge."

"Oh, dear."

*****

"So, is Charles going to be a better guy for you than either Karel or Dan?"

"How would I know yet? He is awfully young, 'though. He's asked me to join him for the modern dance concert next month."

"You accepted." But Kristie's tone was not accusative.

"Yes." Bobbie visibly relaxed. "Oh, Kristie, I wish I knew why I think I have to do this."

"Maybe the last few months have been too easy." 

*****

"But I thought you and Dan were married!" Claudia seemed quite at ease with being melodramatic.

Other students in the classroom looked up in surprise.

"We're just friends." Kristie looked a little flustered.

"Good friends," Dan clarified.

"You're not dating?" Kirk asked. And, without waiting for an answer, continued. "Do you like baseball, Kristie?"

"Anyone in this room who asks me for a date fails the lab unit." Kristie declared.

There was laughter and complaining as the male students returned to their studies. Some of the female students were whispering and looking at Dan.

"And the same goes for Dan!" Kristie added.

Dan laughed a little ruefully. "Not that I think anyone is going to ask me out, but, yeah. Well, not really fail, but not while we're your TAs."

And there was more laughter and complaining.

"But you're all welcome to join us this Saturday," he added, "when a bunch of us go up in the mountains for some more snowshoeing and winter park maintenance. Lots of work to do." 

*****

(I hope you'll forgive a little distance in point-of-view in the following. There's a lot of stuff to get through.)

Dan and Karel were acquainted with some local Scouters, and had arranged for a joint service project in a couple of remote mountain park areas. The maintenance was primarily aimed at keeping some of the wilderness areas accessible and checking up on the winter wildlife population. (Might as well translate it as Scouting.)

Some thirty students joined the project for the day, including a number of former Scouts and some active Rovers and Explorers. After meeting the Scouts and their leaders, they split into five groups and snowshoed in to their respective areas, our friends splitting up as well.

(You guessed it. Scouting in our world has lots of parallels in theirs. Or is it our world that has the parallels? We'll use the terms from our world, again, even though the organizations are not connected in anything but concept.)

After two chippu or so of work, they snowshoed back and met as prearranged in a clearing near where they had parked, and built snow forts and had several snow battles. Several times, our four friends singled each other out for attacks, or ganged up three against one, or even went two-on-two, before suddenly grouping and turning on everyone else who happened to be nearby.

Then they all took down their snow forts, scattered the snow evenly around the clearing to reduce the impact of their activities, and trekked back out.

Again, the students met at a cafe on the road back for hot cocoa and non-alcoholic cider. And again our four friends met back at the girls' apartment to say goodnight.

The next week, our four friends made time for a visit to the temple, and some of the students in their classes and study groups joined them.

The following week, they spent Saturday helping at the hospital. Again, some of the students from their classes and study groups joined them.

For two weeks in a row, Karel and Bobbie spent almost all their spare time studying together for their island cultures class. Bobbie had weekend graveyard shifts at the hospital again, but this time Karel went to the hospital and did some volunteer work. During breaks, he and Bobbie would test each other's memories on their homework. Sometime after midnight, Karel found a place to sleep, and he drove Bobbie home in the morning before returning to his dorm and reporting in. On the two Sundays, Kristie took her to church after she showered and changed clothes.

Sometime during all of this, Valentine's day passed without a date for any of them, and Bobbie and Kristie's roommates tried unsuccessfully to tease them about it. The following Sunday, Karel and Dan came over in the afternoon to make chocolates for all the girls in the apartment. (Of course there's a Valentine's day equivalent for Xhilr, and of course it's in mid-winter.)

And nobody talked about the upcoming modern dance concert.

*****

"Hi, Trisha."

Trisha seemed hesitant. "Hi Karel. Are you ready for this?"

"I don't know." Karel didn't elucidate. "Anyway, let's go. It should be interesting."

At the theater in the PE building, neither Karel nor Bobbie sat in the audience. Karel stayed backstage and helped Trisha with the lights. Bobbie was also backstage, making herself useful with props and costumes and a little last-bunmu coaching.

Kristie and Dan were in the audience.

Somehow, between numbers, Bobbie managed to sneak into the lighting booth with Charles, and Charles got to meet Trisha and Karel.

Trisha showed Charles the control panel while Karel took over getting the lights ready for the next number, and that's where Charles was for the rest of the concert, except when he was on stage.

After the concert, Dan and Kristie joined the dance students and Karel and Bobbie and Trisha and Charles. Bobbie and Charles organized a spontaneous "happening" style improvization, at Sister Cherry's urging. Karel found it interesting and even enjoyable, but Trisha was enthralled to be able to participate.

At Trisha's dorm, she thanked Karel for the fun and unusual date, and they promised to keep in touch.

Similar things were said between Charles and Bobbie as they said good night at Bobbie and Kristie's place.

(Mind you, this was not deliberate match-making on Karel and Bobbie's part. It just happened to work out cleanly.

Not all the dating that the four of them did that semester ended so cleanly.) 

*****

"Chad, what are you waiting for?"

"Well, I don't know, Kris. I guess I was kind of hoping for a little something to remember the night by."

Kristie refrained from mentioning that she didn't like to be called Kris. "I think it has been sufficiently memorable, don't you?"

"Can I call you again?"

"Well, I don't know. We don't seem to have that much in common."

Chad seemed to crumble.

Kristie took him gently by the shoulders and tried to get him to look up. "What's wrong?" 

(How she knew this would work with Chad and not result in even worse problems, well, God knows. But she was praying.)

Chad couldn't answer.

Just then, Bobbie and Dan came back. Kristie dropped her hands, and Chad tried to put up a brave front.

Bobbie and Dan stopped on the sidewalk and said goodnight, giving each other a mock salute, and saluted Kristie and Chad, too. Kristie had signaled them with her eyes, so they refrained from hugging, and Dan just left. And Bobbie went inside.

Then Karel came out. He had been lazy about getting a date, so Bobbie and Kristie's roommates had invited him over to play Monopoly. He shook Kristie's hand and then Chad's hand, and left.

"You have a lot of friends."

"Sure."

"Could I be just a friend?"

"If you can be 'just a friend', sure. We do a lot of group activities, and you're welcome to join. If you don't mind being just a friend."

"That's all it would be, isn't it?"

"That's not a fair question to ask at this point. I can't swear nothing would ever change, but you have to assume for now that nothing would ever change. If you hope something will change, you'll be setting yourself up for disappointment."

Chad's face crumbled again.

"Life is like that. You have to invest in a lot of different low yield stock. The one that ends up being worth more than the rest is not always the one you wanted or expected it to be."

"How can you know that?"

Kristie shook her head. "From experience."

Chad looked up at her. "I don't believe you. What sort of guy would break your heart?"

Kristie laughed softly. "That's not quite what happened. But I had a crush on a guy for more than five years. He happens to be one of my best friends, but we probably won't end up getting married. I think he sort of belongs with another of my best friends."

Finally, Chad could make some sense out of what she was saying.

"Could that happen to me?"

"It could happen to you, if you make the small investments in the friends you have. And listen when you talk with God."

He straightened up for real and smiled. Kristie could see that he was fighting back tears, and her eyes were moist, too.

"Thanks."

"Sure."

And they said goodnight, and he left.

 



Well, that one eventually worked out. Chad came over to play board games and such sometimes, and two of the roommates went out with him on several occasions. And he made friends with Dan and Karel and Bobbie.

He eventually got up the courage to start hanging around with students in his own congregation at Church. It was one of the tougher student congregations, with a heavy prevailing cynicism. But he was able to make some friends, and, at least for him, many of the barriers disappeared. And that is another story that might deserve to be told sometime.

 



"So far, our mission experiences are keeping us from having to work too hard for our religion credit." Kristie was feeling a bit better about the Doctrine, Commandments, and Covenants class by this time.

"A half chip a day studying the scriptures isn't too bad, and that includes writing." Bobbie was also pleased with the course. "I'm getting a bit more confident about my understanding of things."

"And with Karel getting revelations for us all the time, we all have top grades." Dan grinned.

"If I were getting all the inspiration, I don't think any of us would be getting the extra credits. We're all working hard and listening to the Spirit." Karel was serious. "Working with you guys can be pretty inspiring, by the way," he grinned.

"I have a question about the agreement thing," Bobbie said. (She was referring to some scriptures similar to the beginnings of sections 41 and 42 of the Doctrine and Covenants of our world.) "Karel said, in class, that we didn't have to agree on everything, and Professor Trilemma said maybe. What is that all about?"

"Well, Karel?"

"Well, yourself, Dan. the prof stopped me on purpose. That'll be cheating if I tell you guys. Besides, you guys already know the answer to this one."

"Not that I particularly like it." Dan raised his eyebrows and made a face.

"Sure you do."

"But how are we guys supposed to be the ones in charge if the women can disagree on the answers?" Now Dan grinned.

"Hey."

"Woops."

Dan and Karel laughed.

"Answers?" Bobbie smiled.

"Reading the assigned scriptures, I think," Kristie said slowly, "that the point is to at least agree on the questions when we pray together."

"Maybe I can see that. That would allow us to get personal instruction, while helping us to keep together even when our answers don't match perfectly."

"Good point, Bobbie. I hadn't really put that part into words for myself yet."

"See, with Karel around, we don't even have to bother stopping to pray," Dan joked.

Kristie tilted her head and gave him a lopsided smile. "Well, I just said a little prayer of thanks in my heart."

Dan turned serious. "Yeah, Kristie. That's part of the reason we get along so well together. We aren't afraid to pray when we're together." 

 




Table of Contents Next: More Dating Others


 

You can find the original first draft of the chapter this chapter was extracted from, and various approaches I have tried with it here: https://free-is-not-free.blogspot.com/2016/07/economics-101-novel-ch06-pt2-dating.html.

Monday, September 13, 2021

Economics 101, a Novel, ch 4, The Second Semester: pt 1 -- Back to School

Previous: Heading Back
for 2nd Semester
Table of Contents

Important things happened during the second semester, too, and I guess I should tell you about some of them.

 



"How was your first day?" Bobbie set her books on the kitchen table.

Kristie looked up from her books. "Lots of homework already. But, good news, too."

"What kind?"

"Dan and I were in the department office, and we were both invited to apply for teacher's assistant work."

"That's great! How did it happen?"

"There was a PhD candidate who had the job last semester, but he decided to focus on his off-campus job and his thesis this semester."

"That sometimes happens, I guess."

"And the teacher remembered us co-leading study groups in the graduate classes last semester, so when he saw us in the office, he invited us to apply."

"Do you think you'll get it?"

"We'll find out tomorrow. I'm excited, but it's going to be a lot more work."

"Yeah, it will. But it's a great opportunity!"

*****

"Hey guys!"

Karel looked up from his books, spread out on the study area table. "Dan. Kristie! What's up?"

"We got the TA job. We get to work together on a couple of undergraduate classes this semester." Dan looked happy.

Bobbie did not look up. "Wonderful!" she said distractedly, and continued working on a diagram.

"We aren't going to have much time to play this semester." Kristie sounded a little sad.

Bobbie stopped to erase a section she didn't like. "We're grad students for real this semester. But we still have the folk dance class to have fun in."

Kristie asked, "Can we keep up the study groups?"

Karel turned back to the book he was reading. "We have to. It's what keeps us in the game."

Dan agreed. "Teaching others is the best way to make sure you understand things," he said as he sat down.

"And letting them explain it back is good review for everyone." Bobbie added.

"We'll squeeze some time in for something," Karel said distractedly as he turned a page. "All play and no work, hey?"

"I wish." Kristie sat down, too.

"Yeah. For sure."

"Amen."

"Now that I think of it, it would be nice," Karel leaned back and laughed.

*****

"I can't believe Professor Trilemma actually admits to expecting more than two chippu a day of study time for a religion class!" Kristie was not showing a happy face as they left the classroom.

(Okay, I'm really going to have to apologize for the professor's name. I'm sorry, see? Just had no other options. No hard feelings?)

"And the grading scale. The work has to show inspiration, in addition to being correct, to receive an A" Bobbie was a bit non-plussed, as well.

"Well, he didn't say that everyone would have to work that hard, just that some may. And he did point out that we still have time to drop the class." Karel was being blasé.

"He said, most. But we'll help each other, and Karel can always get inspiration for us!" Dan was joking again.

"Yeah!" Kristie was enthusiastic.

"Go, Karel!" Bobbie grinned.

"I don't think that's quite what he had in mind. But are we all okay about Discussions of Faith getting only a week?"

"That week's definitely going to be at least two chippu a day." Dan laughed.

Bobbie suggested, "We can study ahead."

"So we're not going to drop the class?"

"No way!" three voices chorused.

*****

During the second week of the semester, when Karel and Bobbie went to talk with their professors again, Melissa told them how things were going.

"We've been talking with your missionaries, and they're suggesting I get baptized."

Karel was apparently feeling blasé again. "That's not surprising, I guess."

Bobbie asked, "How do you feel about that?"

"I feel pretty good about it, really. The ministering couple are sitting in on the lessons, and we've been going through some of the teachings I grew up with -- you know, comparing my catechism with what Ehyephoottu believe."

Karel started paying attention. "I wonder if that's really a good idea."

"Well, they tell me how, in your church, instead of having hard rules handed down from the clergy, you usually pray and apply the principles you know and pray some more and see what feel the Holy Spirit is telling you is right. And sometimes you end up taking one approach and sometimes another. And what they say seems right to me."

"Well, great!" Bobbie enthused.

"I think it's pretty much the way I was brought up to believe we should do, but somehow as we get older we start depending on tradition and rules."

"Rules and traditions can be better than nothing," Karel suggested.

Bobbie gave Karel a slightly annoyed look.

"I think we just get lazy and quit asking," Melissa explained.

Bobbie gave Karel a triumphant look, which Karel returned with a mock moue and a duck of the head.

"But there's a little bit of a problem." 

Bobbie and Karel quit challenging each other with their eyes and both turned to listen.

Karel asked, "What's that?"

"My husband wants to baptize me, but the bishop wants him to wait."

Bobbie said, "Well, that also happens sometimes."

And Karel added, "And then you have to decide whether you can help your husband more by being baptized first, or by giving him a reason to do whatever he needs to do to get ready to baptize you."

Bobbie looked at Karel and frowned. "You are treating this too lightly. Too  blasé."

"Okay, I'll shut up."

"But that is basically what the ministering couple both suggest, that I should pray and decide for myself which way to go. And the bishop says it's up to me and Winn."

Bobbie opened her mouth to ask "What do you think?" but Karel beat her to it. And they challenged each other with their eyes again, grinning slightly.

"I'd kind of like him to baptize me. That's part of what I like about what you guys believe."

"That priesthood can be part of family life?" Bobbie asked, giving Karel a "Beat you to it!" look. Karel rolled his eyes towards the ceiling.

"Yes. Well, you two are having fun today."

Grinning, they said, "Sorry," in unison. Karel scratched his head embarrassedly.

"No problem. I've found myself having a little fun with Winn like this, too. It's like we read each other's minds sometimes." And she paused to think.

Bobbie nodded. "Being able to agree on what you believe really changes things."

And Karel agreed.

"Can I ask you guys a kind of personal question?"

"Should I leave?" Karel offered, standing up.

"No, actually, I'd like to hear both of your opinions, and I think I could get honest answers from you two."

"Okay, shoot." Karel sat back down.

"Uhm, ..."

Bobbie said, "Go ahead. Anything. We're feeling adventurous today."

"I can tell you are. Uhm, it has to do with, well, sex."

Karel said, "Ouch. Maybe I should leave after all," as he leaned forward to stand.

But Bobbie turned to him and said, "No need." Then she turned back. "Ask away."

Karel sat back somewhat resignedly.

"Maybe I shouldn't ask."

"It doesn't bother me. I'm not sure why it should bother Karel."

"Well, if you're sure. Is it okay with you, Karel?"

Bobbie was giving him a "Don't you dare run away from this!" look.

Karel looked quietly at the floor. "Well, errm, I guess it's okay, but suddenly I don't feel very adventurous after all. I don't know whether I'll have anything helpful to say."

"Don't worry about him. He'll be all right." Bobbie patted him on the knee.

Melissa looked from one to the other. She could see that Bobbie was open to talk, but she couldn't read Karel's expression. He didn't seem too unwilling to talk about it, so she decided to go ahead anyway. "Would you be worried, Bobbie, if your husband masturbated sometimes?"

And Bobbie answered, "I wouldn't think it's a problem."

Karel didn't say anything.

Bobbie asked, "Well, do you disagree, Karel?"

"Uhmm," Karel was feeling anything but comfortable. "It's not a simple question."

So Bobbie shrugged and said, "Oh, ignore him."

"Well, for instance," he continued, "reading, I mean, looking at pornography is not good. If it includes pornography, I would think that could be a problem."

Bobbie nodded.

"Playboy or that kind of thing?" Melissa asked. 

(The word "playboy" is a direct translation. I guess it's no surprise that their world has such a magazine with essentially the same name.)

Karel took a deep breath before answering. "If a man looks at a woman to lust after her he has committed adultery with her in his heart." (You'll probably recognize the similarity to Matthew 5: 28.) "I'm pretty sure that covers pornography, too."

"When I met Winn, I knew he would sometimes read Playboy. I think he got it from a friend. But I told him I didn't want to feel like I had to compete with those air-brushed pictures of impossibly physically ideal women, and he promised he wouldn't look at it any more. I've never seen it in the house since we got married."

"That's good," Karel affirmed.

Bobbie nodded in agreement.

Karel added, "I think what you just said is a big part of the problem with pornography. The images are altered to match artificial ideals. It's sharing things that shouldn't be shared, and, to ease the discomfort people naturally feel, they airbrush out the individuality. So it ends up very similar to worshiping a false god. Or becoming fanatical about a false ideal. Nobody can compete with that."

"Nicely put, if wordy." Bobbie said with a smirk. Then she teasingly asked, "How is it that you know so much about this?"

"Uhm," Karel turned slightly pink. "Well, I guess I've thought about it a bit. A bit more than I think I wish I had. Sometimes football players bring stuff into the locker room, and you end up seeing things you wish you hadn't."

"Sorry." She looked away and sighed. "I shouldn't tease you about this." She turned back to Melissa. "But that isn't really your question, is it?"

"No. The bishop wants him to abstain for a month before he performs my baptism."

"Abstain from sex?" asked Bobbie.

"No, just doing it by himself."

Karel said, quietly, "I'm not sure Winn is going to be happy about being talked about like this behind his back. Some guys are kind of sensitive about it."

But Bobbie asked, "Is his abstaining from it going to cause problems for you?"

"I don't think so. I mean, I think I would rather he get a little relief by himself than pressure me for sex when I'm not interested. But I just wonder why it's a big deal."

Bobbie said, "I can't say I know why." Turning blithely again to Karel, she asked, "What do you think?"

Now he sighed. "It is my understanding that a guy who doesn't try to control himself is more likely to try to force someone else, for example."

"Hmm." Melissa had to think about that. "So it's kind of like emotional endurance training or something?"

Bobbie said, "I don't think that's guaranteed. I knew a bishop who was really strict with the young men in the quorums, and his son was one of the guys who couldn't keep his hands off of me."

"Ouch." was all Karel could say.

"Then this isn't a general rule?" Melissa was surprised.

"Which?" Karel asked.

"His son was definitely doing things he should have been taught not to do, if that's what you're asking." Bobbie replied to what she thought Melissa was asking.

Then Karel replied to his interpretation of her question. "A bishop is responsible for getting revelation on how to interpret many parts of Church policy for specific individual situations. Sometimes bishops get it wrong, and sometimes members of their congregations suffer for it. But that's also part of what Jesus' atonement helps us with. Otherwise, we could never dare take part in the burden of the Church. God would have to do it all."

Bobbie lips drew tight, but she kept her thoughts to herself for the moment.

"Not a general rule ..." Melissa wanted a bit of confirmation.

"Not exactly," Karel nodded and continued. "The youth are taught not to neck and pet, but not so much attention is given to masturbation. Maybe your bishop thinks your husband needs to develop some personal strength through this. It might help him have the courage to talk with you about sex. And not just joke or make demands, if he tends to do that."

(What he describes is fairly closely parallel to how things were in our world back in the comparable time. It's a little different in our present world, in no small part because, in our world, sex has become so thoroughly blown out of proportion in mainstream society that it's almost a separate religion in itself.)

"Maybe I can see that. Up until now, we just really haven't talked about sex very much, just left it up to our moods." She smiled a little shyly. "Maybe we need to talk about it more." Then she apologized. "I shouldn't have asked you guys about this."

"It's okay." Karel said.

And Bobbie added, "Yeah. What we think doesn't really matter. What matters is what you and Winn and God think."

"And your bishop. He's supposed to be able to help you help each other, and help you figure out what God wants."

Bobbie lips pursed and her face clouded, but, again, she kept her own counsel.

Nobody had anything else to say, and the silence dragged out just a moment.

"Did someone forget to turn on the heat today?" Professor White asked at the door. "This room feels a little cool."

"Don't give up. Talk with Winn about it and do what you think is right." Bobbie said as she stood up to leave.

And Karel nodded as he stood and followed her out. "Hang in there. And pray about it." 

*****

After talking with their professors, Karel and Bobbie walked to the library to meet Dan and Kristie. But there was a palpable wall between them.

As they approached the quad, Bobby said, "I didn't think you were a Pharisee."

"Huh? What did I say?"

"Not entering in yourself, and keeping others who would enter in from doing so. Or something like that."

"Uhm, taking away the key of knowledge." (We can find such a scripture towards the end of Luke 11.) "But we don't know that their bishop is doing that. He may have good reason for wanting her husband to practice a little self-control."

"That son of a bishop ..."

"Mmm ... so he wasn't a very nice guy."

"No, he wasn't."

"Tell me about him?"

"Well, I knew I shouldn't have been making out with him, but I thought he'd know where to draw the line."

"He tried to get more than you wanted to give."

"He said he was going to lose control, and he wasn't allowed to do it by himself, and when I refused to 'help him', as he put it, he threatened to tell his father I was trying to make him disobey the law of chastity."

"Oh, man. Badly, badly confused. Did he use physical force?"

"Not exactly. Eventually, he gave up and drove me home."

"So he tried using emotional force, but gave in. Very small point in his favor. Did you talk to his father?"

"His father called me in to the bishop's office and asked me to tell my version of things, so I did. And then he disfellowshipped me. Said I had tried to seduce his son."

"Oh, ..." Karel winced and searched for words. "Ouch. Crud. I mean, woops. Sorry to swear."

"Say 'shit' if you mean 'shit'."

"Crud has a little broader use, although I probably should have said, 'What a terrible mess.'"

"If you had said that, I wouldn't have believed you meant it."

Karel grimaced. "Anyway, I'm sorry to hear about it. It's too late to make much difference now, but did you take it to the stake president?" (Again, borrowing a term from the similar office in Mormondom, the stake president is the lay clergy who has presiding authority for the stake.)

"Nobody told me I could. But that guy's dad was released from being bishop about three months later, and he ended up excommunicated. Apparently he couldn't keep his own hands off of one of my friends, either. Like son, like father. I don't hold it against the Church, but my father did for quite a while."

"I'm sure that didn't help the congregation, either."

"The next bishop called me in practically immediately after he was called. Said he had reviewed all the records and asked to hear my side of things. I told him, and he apologized and made sure the whole disfellowshipment thing was cleared from my Church records."

"I'm glad to hear that."

"And the congregation quit being so Pharisaical after that. Trials with blessings, I guess. Eventually my father quit complaining about it, but I think it still bugs him."

"What happened to their family?"

"They joined an Immersion Covenantist church, and raised a fuss about evil Ehyephoots."

"That's too bad."

"Yeah. But they were only welcomed there until the members of that church figured out what was going on. After about a year of warnings, they asked them to find another church to attend. I heard he and his wife divorced about then."

"It's too bad he wouldn't repent. Must have been hard on their congregation, too."

"At first, but, like I said, we recovered. And it actually helped relationships with all the churches in the community. Members of that church and ours had to talk about the problems that man and his son were causing, and we ended up making a lot of friends. And when we became more friendly, other churches seemed to join in. And they warmed up to us participating in a lot of community activities -- Scouting, Lion's Service Club, volunteering at the hospital, .... I think things in the community just got a lot better after that." (Again, borrowing terms with parallel meanings from our world.) "God moves in a mysterious way, and all that."

"It's good that a lot of things worked out okay. Do you ever hear how things are going with their family?"

"His wife never remarried. Refuses to trust men. But he and his son started their own church in another town and regularly publish anti-Ehyephoot stuff that most people just find amusing, or just ignore."

"That's too bad." Karel paused. "But it's good that you can talk about it like this."

"I learned somewhere along the line that I had to just let it go and forgive him, or it would tear me apart."

Karel nodded. "Better to let things like that go." He paused again. "I still don't think trying to exercise self control is a bad idea."

"I can't argue with self-control, but those are powerful forces. Innocent people can get hurt."

Karel didn't know what else to say, so he said nothing for a while. As they entered the library, he finally said, "I think we're going to have to agree to disagree about this."

"Fine by me."

*****

Towards the end of January, the four of them were walking to the gym for the folk dance class, and Dan said, "Let's go snowshoeing this Saturday."

"Can we rent snowshoes?" Kristie asked.

"Same place we rented the skis."

Bobbie said, "Well, you two go ahead. I have a date for Saturday."

"Karel!" Dan exclaimed, giving him a nudge.

"Uhm, I have a date, too. I'm taking the sister of one of the guys in the dorm to the art museum. She's an engineering student."

Kristie exclaimed, "Bobbie?"

"One of the students in the class I'm TA-ing for wouldn't take no for an answer. He's not really my type. But, I guess, if I'm going to meet other guys on campus, I have to start somewhere. He found out I have the master's in dance, so he asked me to a modern dance performance."

Dan and Kristie looked at Karel and Bobbie with an expression like they were traitors.

Bobbie said, "I have to do this."

And Karel said, "Bobbie needs our support. Besides, if we're supposed to be patient, maybe we should all still be hanging around with other people, too."

Kristie said, "Dan, you and Karel go ahead without us. I need to talk with Bobbie."

Dan looked at Karel, and Karel shrugged. "Okay." And they went in ahead of the girls.

"What are you doing?" Kristie didn't hide the urgency in her voice.

"What do you mean?"

"I know that there are no guys better for either of us than Karel and Dan. What is happening here?"

"For you, maybe. And maybe just now. I'm not getting that answer for myself."

Kristie looked at Bobbie, but she would not meet her eyes.

"Bobbie, if you're still worried about what I said last fall, about taking Karel away from me, please, don't worry about it. I was feeling insecure then. Hanging around together has, well, shown me that I don't need to be insecure."

"Maybe that's all God wants of us. To learn we don't have to be scared of people when He is our Friend."

"I know I can't receive revelation for you, but I don't believe it. We weren't meant to be broken up."

"But that doesn't mean we have to get together. I mean, seriously. Four-way marriage sure isn't allowed."

"Don't joke about this. Don't run away from happiness."

"I'm not. But I need room. For now." Bobbie looked up with pleading in her eyes.

"Well, ..." As they met each others' eyes, something passed between them that you and I would not be able to put into words. "... it's not like I really can tell you what to do. But if you need to talk, remember, I can be here for you just like you've been here for me."

"Thanks."

And they exchanged hesitant smiles and hugged each other and went inside the gym.

 



While it was easy, it was easy.


Table of Contents Next: Dating Others



You can find the original first draft of the chapter this chapter was extracted from, and various approaches I have tried with it here: https://free-is-not-free.blogspot.com/2016/07/economics-101-novel-ch06-pt1-second.html.

Monday, September 6, 2021

Economics 101, a Novel, ch 3 -- Heading Back for the Second Semester

Previous: More Togetherness Table of Contents

In the previous chapter, we got to see more of the group date activities that Bobbie and Karel and Dan and Kristie participated in together. Even so, I ended up glossing over a lot. There were just too many things going on to be able to tell them all. (At some point, I have to say I've told enough of the story.)

But there were a few more important things that happened before we pick things up in the second semester. I say, important, but some find some of the subjects the four of them talked about on the road back to school unpleasant -- sexual matters, including rape. But they each are thinking about marriage, and not just in the backs of their minds. And I personally think it's important for people contemplating marriage to talk about these kinds of things, so I'm letting you in on the conversations.




They drove in caravan on the road back. Dan and Karel each kept company with their own thoughts in their own cars, and Kristie and Bobbie kept each other company in Kristie's car, sometimes talking together and sometimes just thinking.

They had prearranged to find a rest stop and take a break every couple of chippu. Kristie and Bobbie were in the lead when they found a rest stop for the first break and pulled off the road.

They got out of their cars in the cold winter air, stretched, walked around, and exercised a bit, and then sat down at one of the picnic tables to talk. Dan got a glass bottle of a size that would hold roughly three liters or a gallon out of his cooler, and they all drank still-hot home-made lemon-apple cider from paper cups.

Kristie asked Dan, "Just out of curiosity, what did Sheliah mean when she told Bobbie and me that we might even be as cool as she?"

Dan and Karel's eyes met, and their mouths twitched as they stifled embarrassed laughter. Dan looked at the sky and said, "You didn't really have to ask that, did you?"

Kristie looked a little put-out at his response. Bobbie's expression became sharp.

Karel's face slipped into a half-embarrassed smile, and he looked away and said, "Well, Dan and I think you two are pretty cool, too."

Dan's self-control broke at that, and he buried his face and his laughter in his hands. His shoulders shook and his voice was muffled. "You never cease to amaze me, Karel, both on and off the field."

Bobbie was trying to assume the inquisitor's expression, but she couldn't keep a straight face. "So it means something?" she suppressed a laugh that was half-chuckle, half-snicker.

Dan controlled his laughter and sighed and sat back, looking first towards Kristie and then Bobbie. "My little sister," he declared, pausing to look each in the eye, "has designs on both of you."

At this, all four of them burst into laughter. Karel explained further, "When I met Dan's family the first time, Sheliah was what? seven or so?"

Dan said, "Yeah."

"She wrapped her arms around my waist and looked up at me and said, 'I'm going to marry you when I grow up.'"

"No way!" Kristie exclaimed.

She and Bobbie were both amused. 

"Karel was a gentleman. He said he liked her, too, but she'd better wait until she turned twenty, to be sure. Ever since then, it has been a bit of a running joke when Karel comes to visit."

Kristie smiled. "I think we see."

Bobbie added with a nod, "I wouldn't blame him for robbing this cradle, she's really cute."

"Yeah. I would be sorely tempted. Fortunately for all concerned, she has since found guys her own age interesting. But she still says that I absolutely have to find someone as cool as she is or she'll stop me from marrying. And, of course, her big brother has to find someone as cool as she is, too."

Out there at that rest stop beside the highway in the desert, you could hear the sound of the breeze in the sage. Nothing else moved.

Bobbie put her hands out on the table. Kristie followed suit. Karel gathered their hands together in his, and Dan placed his hands on top.

Karel said, "Back in September, I asked my father in a letter for a father's blessing. I suspected I'd need help with a decision that I wasn't sure I was ready for. He gave me that blessing while I was home over Christmas." He paused for thought. "God told me to be patient a little while longer, and wonderful things were waiting."

After a few moments of silence, Kristie said, "Bobbie explained to me that I could ask my father for a father's blessing, too -- that is, even though he couldn't use priesthood authority to do it, he could still give me a blessing because he's my father, and it's a father's right. I asked him and he gave me a very nice blessing. In it, he told me that God would help us figure out if we should get together, and, if so, who should go with whom, in His own due time."

Bobbie looked from Kristie to Karel and then Dan, who spread his hands and said, "Of course I talked about us with Mom and Dad. And Dad gave me a father's blessing, too. Basically, he told me to be patient, too."

After another moment, Bobbie said, "My Dad was a little scared, at first, because he's not actively coming to Church, and he still complains about the leaders sometimes. But he gave me a father's blessing, too." She paused before continuing. "Why did God tell us all to be patient?"

Dan said the obvious -- "I guess we all need to study this out some more before we try to make commitments?"

Karel thought out loud: "But it's not going to mess things up to start talking a little about how we feel about each other, is it?"

Bobbie said, "I still need time, and I'd like to, uhm, I don't really know why, but I need to go on single dates with some other guys. Maybe it's to prove to myself what I think I already know, but I guess I need time."

Kristie and Bobbie's eyes met.

"Whatever way it works out," Kristie said, "that will be what's right. I trust you guys and I trust myself. We're friends. I trust us."

They listened to the sound of a truck engine in the distance. It grew louder as the truck approached, and then the pitch dropped suddenly from the Doppler effect as it passed, then rose again as the driver shifted down for a change in grade.

An eagle flew overhead, then suddenly dove for its prey on the other side of the highway. What that eagle was doing so close to the highway, I don't know. It probably had something to do with the prey being so close to the highway, which only begs other questions which are not part of the plot. We're getting distracted. 

 



In an earlier period, I think the four of them might have ultimately asked their prophet to allow them to be sealed in a relationship that might be hard to explain to the modern mind in our world. I'm not talking about what gained popularity again in the nineteen-sixties in our world as group marriage.

It might be simple enough to talk about young children pricking a finger, then pressing the fingers together where the blood beads on the skin and proclaiming themselves blood siblings. There's perhaps a similar intent, but priesthood sealings invoke divine permission and approval, not just personal intent -- and they don't involve cuttings, nor the drawing and mingling of blood.)

Such sealings of friendship are no longer performed in our world, nor in theirs at the time of this story. Either we don't need them in our modern culture, or they would be too misunderstood. Maybe both.

Anyway, it's clear that these four were finding their hearts becoming knit together in friendship.

This kind of friendship is special, and it endures. And it gave them the courage to refrain from haphazard commitments or experimentation.

 



"Group hug!" Bobbie called out, jumping up. Kristie grinned in surprise and stood as well. Dan and Karel looked at each other in amusement and stood, looked at the table between them and the women and ran around it, and they had a nice, big group hug. 

And then they got back in their cars and drove on, Dan in the lead this time, Kristie and Bobbie behind him, and Karel taking the rear.

Kristie and Bobbie were both lost in their own thoughts, uncharacteristically silent for a gohb or more.

"Bobbie?" Kristie broke the silence.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask?"

Bobbie reached over and gave her a nudge. "Ask, or else."

"Are you holding back for me?"

"Holding back?"

"You like Karel, right?"

"Don't tell me you don't like them both, too."

"Yeah. Well, ..."

"I think we're all facing the same question. Sure, if we looked at age, you and Dan should get together, and Karel and I should get together, but age is not the most important thing."

"What's most important?"

"You're asking me?"

Silence reigned for another little while, then Kristie broke the silence again. "We'll always be friends, though, right?"

Bobbie scooted over from the passenger side on the front seat. (It was one of those bench seats that is now considered dangerous, but they didn't really think about things that way at that time on Xhilr, any more than we did back then. The bench seat was standard equipment for most cars.) She put an arm around Kristie's shoulder and gave her a hug. And a kiss on the cheek.

It was a good thing Kristie was driving, I guess, because, if Bobbie had been driving and scooted over to the passenger side to hug Kristie, that might have been dangerous. Scooting and driving at the same time takes skill. On the other hand, Bobbie, being trained in dance, might have pulled it off okay. But she wasn't driving, so we don't have to worry about that.

"Friends. Forever." she said. After a moment or two, she slid back a bit to give Kristie room to drive, patting Kristie's hand on the steering wheel and smiling.

Then she glanced back at Karel, driving at a safe distance behind. Karel smiled and waved.

"Karel's waving."

"So's Dan." Maybe he had been watching in his rear-view mirror. Both girls raised their hands and waved back. 

(In our world, today, such a display of affection would be the cause of much mis-aimed fuss followed by unreasoning counter-fuss. In those days, in their world as much as ours, it was still considered perfectly normal for women to kiss each other as an expression of ordinary affection. Very few would have even considered that Bobbie might have been coming on to Kristie.

She wasn't, of course, and it seems a shame to me that I should have to even think about needing to point that out. 

I suppose, even then, in other circumstances, Kristie might have been concerned. But with Bobbie and Dan and Karel, it just wasn't a question.)

The temporary silence between them was broken.

"Did we find out if we need dance costumes for the folk dance class?"

"Dan asked the teachers, and they said it's not a performance class so we don't need costumes. They actually said costumes would just be in the way in a beginners class. Other than clogs. We might want to buy clogs for the clogging dances." (Of course they have clogs. Doesn't every world?)

"I think this class will be fun. Have you ever danced in clogs?"

"Yep. It's hard work."

And they talked about many things until they stopped for a break again.

At this stop, Bobbie shivered in the cold air and announced, "I'm going for a run! Who's coming?"

This was answered by a chorus: 

"Yeah!" 

"Oh-kay!"

"Let's go!"

And then Karel said, "But we should lock the cars, just to be safe." Which they did.

After stretching and warming up, they took an easy, slow run about fifty paces ahead of the rest area and back.

Then they shed their coats and ran about two hundred paces or so ahead to a roadsign, keeping together, laughing as they came to a stop at the sign. Then they took an easy run back to the cars, continuing on about two hundred paces behind the rest area and turning around and running back again. After about two ghobu of running back and forth, they cooled down, talking while they walked and stretched.

Dan pulled a small practice football out of the stuff in the back of his car, and the four of them tossed it around for a gohb or so while they continued to talk.

Before they got too cooled down, they drank more warm lemon-apple cider from Dan's cooler, put their coats back on, and got back on the road.

In the car again, after a little more talk, Kristie said, "I kind of hesitate to ask about this, but back last fall, I told you about when Karel rescued me that time."

"Uh, huh."

"I didn't ask you back then, but I have the idea that you might have had some bad experiences with men, too."

"Uh, huh."

"Can I ask about it?"

"Well, I guess I can."

"It still bothers you?"

"Definitely. Until I met Dan and Karel, I was wondering if I'd ever meet a decent man I could trust -- besides my dad. But, now that I've been on campus a while, ... really, there do seem to be quite a few decent guys on campus."

"The church influence helps, doesn't it?"

"It does."

"What happened? It must have been a bit worse than that bunch of guys in their car whistling at me."

"Outside of campus, it seems like I get very few days without at least one or two guys making a pass at me, hitting on me emotionally, trying to get their hands on me."

"What kinds of things do you call hitting on you?"

"Well, you know how some guys use their eyes to check you out? And they make sure you notice that they're looking you over and then they get this look in their eyes like, 'You know you want me to take your clothes off.'? That kind of stuff."

"That sometimes happens to me. What do you do?"

"It took me a long time to get over just freezing, like a deer in the headlights."

"That's dangerous."

"Yeah .... You don't have that reaction."

"My mother taught me a bit of non-verbal communication. But I just had to figure out for myself how to say, 'Mind your own business!' with my eyes. And then mind my own business. Make it clear with my actions that, no matter how long they wait, nothing's happening. But you know how to do that, too, don't you?"

"Somewhat. Maybe I just attract the attention of really stubborn guys. But this campus is a relief. Not perfectly free of it, but definitely a relief."

Kristie paused, debating with herself about asking more.

Bobbie didn't make her ask. "I've had worse."

"Can I ask how bad?"

"I've been raped by four different men."

"Wow." Kristie bit her lip. "Sorry to ask. It hurts to talk about, I guess."

"Not so much as it used to. I've talked it out with my parents, and a little bit with my current bishop. After I decided I could trust him, of course."

"It's good to have a bishop you can trust that much. But he's not going to ask you to marry him. "

"Right. That's probably why only married men can be bishops in this church."

"Uhm," Kristie hesitated, "how about women?"

"Women I can trust? I've talked about it with a Relief Society quorum president that I knew I could trust, too." (On Xhilr, it was explicitly a quorum. Other than that, the name translates the same.)

"It's good to have women leaders we can trust that much, too, I guess."

"At least sometimes."

There was a bit of silence.

"Something tells me you weren't asking about women I could confide in."

"No."

Bobbie hesitated. "Women who attacked me?"

"Uhm, ..." Kristie didn't quite articulate her response.

"Thankfully, no. Uh, wait. Oh, Dear. Did I, ... ?"

"No. It's okay. I know the difference. It's actually because of how you kissed me that I felt like I might be able talk about it with you."

"Oh. That's a relief. Well, I'll listen if you want to talk about it."

"You'll be the first person I've ever told besides my bishop when I got baptized. He told me I didn't have to repent of something I didn't do, and that helped."

"That's so hard for some people to understand, that, even when the attacker doesn't say it, the victim can find it so easy to believe she did something wrong."

"So we're both damaged merchandise."

Bobbie laughed a wry laugh. "I said something like that to my mom, and she threatened to turn me over her knee and whip me. That got me to laugh, but then she turned serious and said that I absolutely must not think such things. If we let them tell us we're damaged merchandise, they've raped us emotionally, and it makes it easier for them to rape us again. That's why they try to get us to believe we are bad."

"I've never been able to tell either of my parents."

"Have you tried?"

"I back down every time."

"It does take a right time and place, and some parents should not be told, even though they are good parents. Not saying anything about your parents, of course, just that there's no rushing things."

The conversation continued, and we don't need to know any more details. The only thing we need to know is that they found a way to give each other emotional support.

At their next stop, while they were eating sandwiches they made from food packed in Dan's cooler, Dan said, "This is no fair. You two get to talk, and Karel and I have to talk to ourselves."

"It's just girl talk," Bobbie laughed.

Kristie quietly swallowed a mouthful of sandwich.

Karel said, "Penny for your thoughts."

Kristie and Bobbie's eyes met, and they both nodded after a moment. Kristie said, "We were talking about rape."

Dan and Karel looked at each other in surprise. Dan said, "Sorry we asked."

Kristie pursued the topic. "So, would you guys consider a woman who had been raped damaged merchandise?"

Dan looked at Kristie with wide eyes and said, "If I hear of anyone touching either of you, I'll ...," and then he stopped and looked down. Then he looked back to Kristie and started again. "I don't know. The Lord says vengeance is His, but, ..., oh, I don't know."

Karel said, "Vengeance doesn't solve anything. But the phrase, 'damaged merchandise' needs to be cleared up. People are not merchandise."

Both Bobbie and Kristie raised their eyebrows. Bobbie spoke. "My mother said something like that."

Karel went on. "And we're all damaged, ultimately. But the real damage is what the rapist does to himself. The victim suffers, but the attacker condemns himself to hell."

Bobbie's eyes narrowed, and Kristie's eyes opened wide.

Dan turned on his friend. "What the ..." he censored his words and unclenched his fist, "are you saying?"

"Hear me out. Rape and seduction hurt the person on the receiving end. I'm not saying anything about that. And the victim needs emotional support and medical and all sorts of other help." 

He paused, and the wind chill factor dropped with a rise in the wind. 

He continued. "The victim must never blame himself or herself, whether it was partly consensual or completely forced. That leads to sympathy for the attacker of the sort that allows the attacker to do it again." 

The other three nodded guardedly.

"The attacker stands condemned before God and his or her own conscience. Novels and movies trivialize condemnation but it's not a small thing. If the attacker is allowed to do it again, he or she adds condemnation to condemnation, making it even harder to repent."

Dan was looking less confused. Bobbie's and Kristie's expressions were still unreadable.

Bobbie said, "Maybe I can understand what you're saying, but I still don't like it. It sounds like you're siding with the rapist."

"God wants to save the rapist, too. Salvation for the rapist includes getting him to find a better way to relate to people."

Kristie slowly nodded. "Okay, I'll accept that. It means that I don't have to hate my aunt, just see that she is never alone with me until I know that she has confessed and stopped. Maybe I can talk to my parents about it after all. Carefully."

Dan' jaw dropped, but after a moment he recovered himself and closed his mouth. "I'm sorry, Kristie." He struggled for words, reaching out to take her hand, and said, "It makes me think no less of you." 

Kristie hesitated, then let him take her hand.

Bobbie's expression relaxed a bit. "I think I can agree with that. My former-boss did repent, and letting him repent helped me put it behind me. I guess I know what you're saying. Letting him repent was right. He never tried it again that I heard, and it seems to have saved his family. His wife and I still talk about it sometimes when I'm home, and I'm pretty sure from what she says that he's changed."

Karel mouthed a silent, "Oh." And then he reached out for Bobbie's hand. She took his and reached out to take Kristie's free hand, and the four of them were holding hands together across one of those rest stop picnic tables for the second time that day.

Bobbie smiled. "You guys are okay."

After a few bunmu they were able to clear the moisture in their eyes, and Bobbie said she was hungry, and they all finished their sandwiches.

"You're unusually quiet, Dan." Kristie looked at Dan inquisitively.

"Well, ..."

"Well, what?" Bobbie prompted.

"Maybe you guys wouldn't think I was so great."

"Get it off your chest."

"Before I met Karel, I wasn't much of a gentleman. Did my share of making out."

"He wasn't that bad. Near as I know, he didn't really impose himself on women like some of the team did. All of his girlfriends that I knew trusted him not to cross the lines they set." Karel turned to Dan. "And you never slept with anyone, that I know of."

"Yeah, that was a line I drew. But I sometimes got my hands where I shouldn't have. And you were the one who had to tell me that just because a girl didn't so no, she wasn't saying yes."

"And you listened to me."

"Well, especially after that time you told us to quit bothering that girl."

Karel creased his eyebrows, as if trying to remember something.

"What happened?" Kristie tilted her head.

"I was out driving with some of the team, letting off steam and stuff, and we saw a really cute girl walking towards campus."

Kristie caught her breath and Bobbie turned to focus on Dan.

"One of the guys said he wanted to try to get a date, so I drove up behind her. They started wolf-whistling and stuff, but I could see it was making her really uncomfortable. Karel happened to be walking the same road, and he told us to get lost, so I took the opportunity and drove away. Made the guys a little mad, but I told them to shut up. I knew I didn't like making women uncomfortable like that."

"Oh, yeah. Next day at practice, you told the coaches about it, and they spent the whole practice time lecturing the team about how badly a lot of them were behaving. Most of the guys straightened up a bit, but some of the guys kept at it until the coaches threatened to suspend them from the team. What are you two laughing about?"

Bobbie stopped laughing and asked, "You don't remember what this woman you rescued looked like, do you, Karel?"

"She was blonde, petite, ..." He stared into the distance beyond Kristie, doubt and recognition fighting in his expression.

Dan looked up. "I was too embarrassed to get a good look at her, but I think she looked a lot like you, Kristie."

"I've heard this story from a different point of view, haven't I, Kristie?"

"You have, indeed."

And they both burst out laughing for real.

Karel's expression resolved to chagrin. "My goodness! That was you, Kristie?" He looked over at Dan, who was shaking his head in disbelief.

"Behold your knights in rusty armor, Kristie." Bobbie grinned.

"Not that rusty, really," she smiled.

"True. But it's fun to hear their side of it, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is. And now I have two knights." Kristie grinned broadly.

Bobbie nodded, smiling "Me, too."

Dan looked happy. "Well, if you guys are forgiving me, I'm doubly glad I got my act straightened out."

Kristie turned to Karel. "So why didn't you ask my name and phone number like most guys would have?"

He scratched the back of his neck. "I didn't want to be rude, or take advantage of the situation ...." His voice trailed off.

Dan chuckled. "Typical Karel."

"Well, I was both pleased and disappointed. You should know you're the reason I took an interest in football."

"I see. Well, I'm glad we got to meet again." He cleared his throat. "I mean, that we got to become friends."

"Karel, why are you such a gallant?" Bobbie's face had a serious look.

Karel looked at the ground. "I have sisters."

"Lots of guys have sisters."

Karel turned to look up the highway, searching for birds in the sky or rabbits by the road, but not finding any.

Dan leaned on an elbow. "I'm interested in this question, too, Karel. Remember Roxanne?"

"Roxanne ... Snow?"

"Kept trying to get your attention, but you only took her dancing twice. And she couldn't get you to kiss her goodnight. I offered to take your place, but she said she wanted someone who understood Kwaxh." (Kwaxh was one of their important philosophers, perhaps comparable to Kant in our world.)

Bobbie and Kristie both stifled laughs.

"That was why you asked me what books to study philosophy from."

"Yeah."

Dan chuckled, Bobbie and Kristie joining him.

"I kind of liked her, but I didn't dare get serious with anyone at the time."

The chuckling stopped.

After a short silence, Bobbie asked, "Well, okay, but can we ask why?"

"She seemed to want me to be serious, and I didn't want to face the conundrum of asking anyone to marry me outside the temple, and I didn't think I could promise I could stay worthy long enough to get ready to go."

Kristie was the one to ask, "And why was that? We're all telling secrets today, what secrets are you hiding?"

Karel covered his eyes, pressing his temples with his thumbs, leaning his elbows on the table. "Some say it's not such a big deal. It was a big deal to me. Still is."

"Masturbation?" Dan asked. "I remember we talked about that a few times."

"Yeah."

Bobbie's expression became sharp again.

"You never struck me as someone who would be into pornography, Karel." Kristie raised her eyebrows, quizzically.

"No. Well, when I was six or seven, sometimes I'd sneak the underwear ads out of the newspaper and go hide somewhere to look at them. But a few months after I was baptized, I realized that getting myself excited with those ads was wasn't really any better than looking at dirty magazines." 

Bobbie's expression remained sharp, but she didn't say anything.

Dan said, "I think you were right about the underwear ads, but don't we all go through that? And we talked about you getting your fantasies under control, and that was a good thing. But I always thought you were being too hard on yourself. Wet dreams don't always happen naturally just because the hormones have gotten clogged up."

"Nocturnal emissions," Karel corrected.

Kristie turned a little pink around her ears. She and Bobbie both nodded absently.

Bobbie added, "Practicing self-control is one thing, but we don't want anyone to suddenly explode."

"I guess that was where I was struggling at the time, trying to figure out what my limits were, so I wouldn't lose control and hurt someone."

"Maybe you were just trying too hard." Bobbie said as she stood up. "But that's between you and the Lord. Let's get back on the road."

Nobody disagreed. I'm not sure why nobody disagreed, but nobody did. So they got back in their cars and continued the next leg of their trip. Karel took the lead, Dan took the tail, and Bobbie spelled Kristie so she could get a nap.

They arrived at Kristie and Bobbie's apartment after nine and had another group hug before they said good night.

As Dan and Karel walked back to their cars, Dan said, "Forgive the attacker?"

"Maybe I can tell you more sometime, but a couple of close friends of mine were in an abusive relationship together in high school, and they repented and are happily married now. He had to repent of the things he did to her, of course, but she also had to repent of some things she did to him, and they both had to repent of believing bad things about themselves. And they had a bit of a wait, both of them relearning their relationship, before they could get married, but they are good people."

"But that's different from rape."

"I can't tell you more, but I can tell you they said it was mutual rape."

"I've gotta think about this. You're still doing things I don't understand. And I still think you're too hard on yourself." Dan grinned and Karel grinned back, and they hugged each other and said good night. 

 




Table of Contents Next: Back to School



You can find the original first draft of the chapter this chapter was extracted from, and various approaches I have tried with it here: https://free-is-not-free.blogspot.com/2016/06/economics-101-novel-ch05-9-heading-back.html.